The ground is still wet, so it's quickly turning into sludge. Still, it's pretty nice.



I need better shoes.

 

I'm studying for Tuesday's exam. I spent 11 hours in the library yesterday and when I got home I cried. From mental exhaustion, frustration, and anger that I still have so much work to do.

I couldn't go back to school today. So Drew said he'd help me focus on studying (which is often a problem when I work from home). I've done four hours so far, but I need a break.

I've reached the outer limits of my intelligence. I've long suspected that the thing separating me from other (fairly) intelligent people was my dedication to studying. Other people can move at a faster clip, pick up what's relevant and easily reduce the minute details so that they're moving past point-by-point memorization. Me, I'm a memorizer.

And I'm slow. I plod along, focusing too much on details and not seeing the big picture often enough. And because of that, because of the hours and hours I've spent trying to shove millions of scraps of information into my head, I've lost my drive to keep studying. And once I lose that, I've lost the only thing separating me from the pack. I'm falling behind. I can feel it.