I was supposed to study chemistry all day today. It's now 6:25 and I've probably studied a little less than two hours.

Every day I'm forced to strike a balance between attending to my personal life and attending to school obligations. And sometimes it's fucking frustrating.

As an undergrad, my personal life consisted of four things (listed in order of the amount of time I invested in each):

1. Searching for and smoking pot.
2. Searching for and having sex.
3. Hanging out with my friends.
4. Eating/sleeping/bathing. (These could be separated, but as individual needs they were all pretty unimportant to me most of the time).

Now my personal life has a bit more gravity. I have a boyfriend who needs certain things from me and, uh... this can feel overwhelming at times. Today our apartment was a wreck and for the past few days he's been feeling kind of blue, so I didn't end up leaving for the library until 3:00.

Sometimes I feel selfish and I'll get aggravated that I have to constantly choose between studying and spending time with him. But now that I'm looking at that list, I realize how much fuller my life is now than it was six or seven years ago. Not just because of Drew, but he's definitely a huge factor.

Also, he's cute. And he's a good kisser.

He's driving out to Joshua Tree with a couple friends right now. I couldn't go because I have a chemistry test on Tuesday. He just called to tell me he left me a surprise on the kitchen counter and in the refrigerator.

Maybe he baked me something. Maybe two hours at the library is enough and I should drive home right now to eat it.